This is a bit late as I meant to post it when Alex turned six months! However, due to having too much fun with him doing activities, playing with friends, attending classes for babies and being knackered at night, I haven’t had the time to write it before. But better late than never, right? I want this post to help other foreign mums (or even English ones) who just like me, are learning the pleasures of motherhood in London! Well being a mum should be a pleasure anywhere in the world, but I do believe that London gives that extra reassurance that you are really enjoying it and that you are doing a great job. Most mums here don’t have any sort of help so we have to be pretty awesome to take care of a baby, husband, house and work, right 😉 I decided to write this as my baby at six months has reached so many mile stones… It is just incredible how in half a year he changed so much and also how my life has turned upside down and all for the best!
Archives for April 2016
Hi everyone, long time no speak, especially about love! I mean, about relationships, as I have been quite immersed in the baby world… but I do still have interest in the dating scene (not for myself but to help others). However, I came across couple of articles that made me worry about single people. Are people giving up on love due to the difficulty of having a proper relationship?
In this first article, Japanese people are apparently having less sex in general due to the fact that they are finding hard to get into relationships. In response, the amount of people turning to “virtual girlfriends” (and probably boyfriends too) are on the rise (read article here). You could think this is a Japanese phenomenon but I also read another article in which an American found easier “to buy a “wife” (link here). He got a manufactured doll with silicone skin to make them “soft” and good for sex.
You could think these are just weird people with sad lives who have preferred to have artificial relationships to real ones. However, I am sure there are a lot of people out there who just can’t be bothered to have a girlfriend/ boyfriend anymore after being deceived in love.
I have met an English friend who would love to have a family. When he is around my son he is great with him. Unfortunately he seem to be “scared” of women and kinda given up on the dream of having wife and kids. He also claims he is too comfortable with his sleeping patterns (he works at night) and ways and is not that interested in having somebody to change that from him. The consequence is, he is always that single friend of everybody.
I also have a Greek friend who recently split up from her long-term boyfriend who she was deeply madly in love with, even though everybody pointed out he was never going to commit to her. She is now finding herself scared of men by thinking they are going to mess her about again and waste even more of her time. When she travels for pleasure, she says she prefers to go to places where she can have fun but without necessarily looking for men. Thankfully she hasn’t given up about love altogether just yet, but sometimes she says she will never love again the way she did or trust men.
Although both my friends haven’t found virtual boyfriend/ girlfriend or a doll to call their “love”, it just show that people all over the world seem to be either giving up on love or are getting over cautious, too picky or vindictive (in case they were cheated on, which is the case with a few Brazilians I know). So it shows it is not just one nationality or another. People from all over the world should not give up on love after having bad experiences. They should actually realise what hurt them the most and try to find somebody else who hasn’t got the same issues which caused them to be traumatised in the first place.
It sounds easy to say but not to put into practice, right? So let me tell, although I got really hurt before, I managed to turn my life around. I gave up a promising job in journalism I loved in Brazil to come to the UK for love. The relationship didn’t work and my confidence was shut down. However, I decided not to give up on love. I decided there is someone out there for everybody. I decided to look for this someone and as you all know, I found him. However, I still had to kiss a few frogs before I found my Dan.
Simple advice I give to everybody who is giving up on love is: Don’t give up. Life is made of ups and downs. You must have gone through a down moment but generally, we were made to be happy and possibly by someone’s side. A few points to remember:
- Don’t fall in love just with the looks. Learn that someone who is not so attractive physically can still make you happy for having a beautiful heart. You might end up seeing this person as the most beautiful ever.
- Find out what you can be tolerant of and what you really can’t.
- Love yourself first without becoming big headed.
- Forgive yourself. If you think that the failure of previous relationships was your fault. It probably wasn’t so never let any former spouses shot you down. And in case it was, don’t repeat the same mistakes with the next person.
Hello everyone! I can’t believe it’s already April, phew! Time is flying and here I am trying to get back into shape. So here is an update on my progress. It has been now nearly six months since I had my Alex and I can now say I have already lost all my baby weight! Thank God for breastfeeding and for my baby for helping me to lose all the weight. Yes, I am now lighter than when I got pregnant but still with wobbly bits though. I was 54kg when I got pregnant and now I am 51 and a bit.
It is no secret to anybody that healthy food with exercise is what make people fit. That is what I did. I didn’t follow any particular diet though, which means I just try to eat healthily but have the occasional treat and exercise. I like to say “I run for my food”. It means that I prefer to exercise in order to have the occasional Ben & Jerry’s and pizza. At the end of the day, balance is everything. If one day I have too much cake (being a mum and getting together with other mums means cake), next day I will make sure I will have salad and a smoothie to compensate. The latter is my usual daily routine anyway keeping cakes and treats for gatherings with friends or the weekend.